Shoe shopping is stereotypically associated with women- women supposedly love to buy shoes, own tons of shoes, can't get enough shoes. Well, here's my deal- shoe shopping is painful. Not physically painful (usually), but emotionally painful. This is due to the fact that I have an extraordinary foot problem.
My Left foot- long, narrow, perfect for heels- is a women's size 9 (US). My right foot is a size 5. While my left foot has long perfect toes, my right's are stunted little stubs. This is because I had Amniotic Band Syndrome in utero, which essentially cut off development for my right foot. My metatarsal 1, also called the Big Toe, was amputated completely, and I was born with only four tiny toes on that foot.
This means that, while others may enjoy buying shoes, I have loathed such an activity for most of my life. Because of the shape of my right foot, I flat-out cannot wear most kinds of sandals and heels. I have an orthotic insert for sneakers, boots, and lace-ups. This means that if the shoe's insert can't be removed to make room for my orthotic, I don't buy it. The orthotic doesn't bend, which means it can't be worn in any shoes with a heel that causes the sole to be curved. If I do want a pair of sandals (that don't have a T-strap, mind you, I can't wear those) or heels, I have to buy two pairs. More importantly, I have to find two pairs of the same shoe that are in size 9 (pretty easily found) and a size 5 (almost non-existent). I then have to shell out twice as much money as the normal purchaser would. Two-for-one deals are like goddamned Christmas to me.
Recently, I ventured into the world of online shoe shopping. At a lot of sites, you can get pretty good deals and you're more likely to find a 5. However, I can't hold them in my hands, judge whether or not they are going to work well with my poorly-designed foot. This also means returning said purchases is harder, which means the anticipation is worse. I ordered two pairs of a flat shoe recently, and they arrived today. I spent about a week being nervous about them- would they fit right, would they be the right sizes, et cetera. They arrived, fit perfectly, and made me wildly happy. Through the miracle of the internet, I am gradually coming to terms with my hatred of shoe shopping.
It's not as bad of a problem as, say, having no right foot at all, but it's something that affects my life every single day. Because of its shape, it gets weird muscle cramps. My knee has a lot of problems and because I'm missing some muscle attachment sites that are normally located on the structure of the big toe, my leg muscles are in a lot pain when I do certain activities. If regenerative medical technology gets good enough, I have every intention of having it replaced. It's not like having unruly hair or oily skin. It causes me problems that, because of the rarity of my condition, cannot be anticipated by doctors. It sucks. And up until now, shoe shopping has constantly served as a reminder of that.
So yeah, I got new shoes today. They fit well and I like them. And that's a pretty big accomplishment.